The letter you can never read.

A close friend recently went through a fairly traumatic experience, and asked me to write about it for him. I’ve never written fiction for pleasure before, but I have wanted to for a long time and was missing source material, so I jumped when he gave it to me. Enjoy :)

Nothing remains but the memories.

They too are scattered, shattered into fragments and spread like the ashes will as they struggle against the cool ocean breeze.

I wonder if some sailor might find them still floating in the sea and piece the page back together like in the detective novels we loved reading and everything will end all right, but I know the laws of the universe are not on my side. But have they ever been on my side?

No. It wasn’t supposed to end like this. What we had was destiny. But sometimes even destiny can be wrong.

“Run,” Pan, the crazy homeless guy who lived in the park would always tell me as I passed him on my way to school, “never be too afraid to run.”

I always assumed he meant to run away from Curro, but as I sit silently sobbing I wonder if he knew something I didn’t. Something about Her. Something about the world.

Now I want to run. Run far away. Run away from Curro. Run from everyone I know and everything I’ve known and wanted and been. Run away from this entire state. Run. Just run.

But I can’t. Not because of my leg, a remnant of that night that may forever haunt me. Not because I don’t have the money, either. But because running would mean admitting that I was wrong.

Maybe I am wrong. And so what if I am? It doesn’t change the facts. Doesn’t heal my leg. Doesn’t change what happened or what will happen.

I open my eyes and stare out to sea. Why am I here? What lead to this? Why do I feel so broken when the world thinks I’m perfect?

I close them. There is no use wasting my energy staring. Sight isn’t always visual.

“I bet Pan would know what to do, ” I think, suddenly.

But then I remember.

It was his fault I was here in the first place. Or was it? Can someone really be blamed for speaking the truth? For warnings left unheeded?

No. I must work through this. I must find some way through it all. I’ve survived this far. I can fight more. I must fight more. I have to. I may have lost everything, but I still have myself. And when you have nothing, you have nothing left to lose.

I slowly light the match and lift it to the letter. It starts burning slowly, and quickly engulfs the letter, turning it to ashes in mere seconds. They float away, like little fortune cookie fortunes, into the sunset and off to the sea. That’s it.

Slowly, I begin to smile. It’s over. It’s finally over. Pan was right. I’m free.

it’s hard
to live in a world
where the most abundant resource
is the hardest to obtain
and whose purpose
seems pointless
yet
somehow
crucial

I was meeting with the individuals who run the Web Marketing/Social Media department for Indian Hills Community College the other day.

They invited me to meet with them because they felt I had been unnecessarily harsh, which is probably true. As you might imagine, our relations thus far have been… complicated, to say the least. It’s a fact that I, as a person, have about three times the internet reach as they do. I know I could be a very valuable asset to them. And yet, they decided to block me on Twitter, “the only student who’ve they blocked so far.”

I was met with sharp statements such as “you’re still finding yourself,” and condescending remarks that implied I was young and naive.

I wasn’t bothered by the statements themselves. I know I’m still exploring life. I know I’m young. I know I’m insanely curious. I know I’m constantly learning. I don’t want to ever stop exploring.

But I was deeply bothered by the fact that those personality traits were stigmatized as such.

I promptly exited the meeting, and walked to the across the building to my independently arranged meeting with President Lindemayer, the highest executive at the school.

I knew Indian Hills Community College is working on several initiatives designed to spur “economic advancement” in the region. After about 15 minutes, I introduced my idea to build a student focused startup incubator/coworking space/hackerspace/startup dorm. And I’m very happy to say that he loved it. We’re pooling resources and rallying students to begin working on this project as soon as possible.

The moral of story isn’t to try and burn bridges because airplanes are the future. The moral is that very few people will truly understand you. Find them. Surround yourself with them. Don’t talk to anyone else. Ignore those who try to stop you.

And constantly explore. Do shit. Have fun. Be curious, constantly. Don’t let anyone try and persuade you to be anything else than who you truly are.

Including me.

As much as I hate to admit it, if you came looking for direction, you just wasted 2 minutes of your life. Only you can develop who you are. You’ll find out how. Trust yourself. Listen to everyone, but ignore everything they say. Trust your intuitions.

yesyoucan

i think i can do these things, but i can’t.

i wish i could write poetry,
i fail at most writing exercises,
this is not haiku.

The Ides are Upon Us!

xD

chrysa0ra:

bowtiesandbiscuits:

15th of May 2012.

Ordered a Caesar Salad today, proceeded to stab it 23 times before consumption. Nobody else found it as hilarious. 

In its last breath the salad looked to you, the last and greatest to stab it

It brushed away the ranch dripping drown from its limp, torn lettuce leaves and in a coarse whisper, said:

“Et tu, Brute?”

(via latin-student-problems)

a sad attempt at writing a poem.

we ask “what is truth?”

we wonder “what are lies?”

but how can truth be as such if all of truth is a lie?

how can we tell?

how do we know?

EXCLUSIVE: What Apple WON’T announce tomorrow

Tomorrow, Apple is slated to announce a REVOLUTIONARY, MAGICAL, INSPIRING, and WORLD-CHANGING new product. Here are my predictions as to what it won’t be:

— A unicorn: sources tell me that Tim Cook has no immediate interest in pursuing the development of mythological equine.

— A new brand of bottled water: despite leaked images suggesting otherwise, sources familiar to the matter have confirmed that Aquafina is “more than adequate as a source of overpriced hydration.”

—A time machine: in a leaked memo, Apple proclaimed that it “was not at all interested” in developing a machine to make up for the “countless hours” its users waste writing shitty posts dedicated to making up and retelling shit for the sole purpose of egotistical page view increases. “People will end up buying our stuff anyway, ” said Tim Cook, CEO of Apple, “why should we worry about how they waste away their lives?”